Frankys Little Sister
by JessMaskellxo
Summary: Franky Doyle had a little sister, her little sister is almost 18 when her life is turned upside down I think I'm rating it M just to be safe... Their may be sensitive parts so warning
1. Chapter 1

First off all its going to start a year before Franky is given parole

Second of all this book might also be published on my wattpad Jessbarberxx

Third off all I know this book is going to be really bad, i have dyslexia and it will probably be really shit so sorry if the book is shit

From Jess

Name: Maddison Alexia Doyle

Nickname: Maddy or Alex

Age: 17 almost 18

Family:

Dad: Alan Doyle

mum: Shell Doyle (made up as we don't know Frankys mums actual name)

Half sister: Tess Doyle

Sister: Franchesca Doyle

About Maddison

1\. She prefers to be called Maddy

2\. She has autism

3\. she doesn't like eye contact

4\. She doesn't know/can't tell when she's putting herself in danger

5\. She self-harms

Theirs a lot more about Maddy but you only need to know a few details otherwise we will be here forever.

She's moving into her second year at sixth form. She is studying computer science, sociology, health and social care and finally Drama.

Her life changed when she ends up lashing out at her mother which results in her murdering her.

Maddy didn't mean to kill her mother, she just had enough of her mum saying she was no good and wouldn't get anywhere in life which is now going to happen.

Maddy has done peti crimes in the past but when her anger hits in it actually kicks in real bad, a month before she killed her mum she did the same thing to the man who, well yourll find out what he did to her later in the story.

Maddy has just been sentenced to prison for life and that's where her story begins.

What will Franky be like when she finds out her sister has murdered two people.


	2. Chapter 2

It was the first day in forever for Maddy. She murdered her mum only days before this bit only a month before she murdered a bloke. Not only has Maddy murdered people she has stolen from shops just to feed herself and she assaulted one off her school  
teachers because they called her names but obviously they denied ever saying anything.

Maddy was going to 'Wentworth Prison' well she's their right now, she's been searched incase shes brought any drugs with her and been given her clothes and belongings (picture of her and Franky when they were little and that sort of stuff)

Maddy was scared, she was only 17 and with autism who knows if prison would be worse for her. Maddy was escorted to cell block H and she was told a number but she wasn't listening.

Their were 6 lady's sat around doing their own things and well Maddy was shown to her cell.

Mandy's PoV

Before I was shown my cell I recognised someone, it wasn't just any someone it was Franky my older sister. She didn't know why I was here but I don't think she saw me. I didn't know what to do or say to anyone so I sat on the bed like thing in the cell  
and sighed.

I women showed up at the door off be cell and looked over st me "you must be Maddison, I'm Bea. Top Dog" the woman tells me and I frown, none ever calls me Maddison, ever! "Don't Call me Maddison, it's Maddy" I respond a bit too loudly to attract  
the attention of all the other women but one in perticular comes over to the cell and it was Franky.

"Maddy, what are you doing here" Franky asked the most stupidest of questions causing me to role my eyes "well I killed mum because I got angry. She had been drinking again and well she was having ago at me like she always has done" i start to say to  
say to my older sister

"Before that, I also killed the man who" I pause, was I really ready to tell anyone what he did to me. "What did he do to you Maddy?" Franky asks me and I look down at my lap which happened to become a lot more interesting than Anything else "he  
raped me" I whisper hoping none heard me,, I held my tears back

"He raped you" Franky asks walking over and sitting next to me. I nodded slowly and my older sister wrapped her arms around me "I hadn't told anyone though, they would probably have said I'm lying" I say into my sisters side and she looks furious "that  
man raped my baby sister!" She growls to none in perticular.

Franky hasn't only been my older sister for all these years, she's been my best friend and like my mum. I look at my older sister and she comforts me.

Franky soon takes me out into the area between all the cells and over to the rest of the women "right Evreyone this is my little sister Maddy" she introduced me to the other 5 women, I already met Bea so it was just the other 4 I had to meet. "Maddy these  
are Maxien (I know she's not in it yet but Im putting her in it), Doreen, Liz and sue but we all call her Boomer" Franky tells me and I nod slowly.

"So why you here?" Bea asks me, I look up every so slightly. "Maddy isn't very good with people, she's got autism" Franky tells the girls and I frown, everywhere I go people judge me because off my autism "I'm  
Here because not only did I murder my mum but I murdered a bloke who" I stop dead in my sentence.

I couldn't tell them about the bloke who raped me, I didn't want anyone else to know but, I might be pregnant, I've put on weight over the past months since he did did that to me and it can't be because I'm eating because I've hardly eaten. If I end up  
pregnant then they will probably find out what happened.

"It's alright Maddy, they won't judge you" Frankh reassures me "the bloke who raped me" I mumble but this time I wasn't able to hold back my tears. I ran back into my cell and curled face down on the bed. I've tried to be strong for so long but  
I can't be strong anymore

Doreen walks into my cell, Franky bad previously told me that Doreen is the support peer person in here. "Maddy, do you want to talk" she asks me and I shake my head still faced down.

I felt like such a baby, I'm 17 but here I am crying like such a baby "well we are just out here if you need to talk" Doreen tells me and I nod. Once I knew she had left I sit up still crying.

I shut the cell door and get my photo of me and Franky when we were younger out and take the back off, my blade was in their and that's where I've always kept it, none knows that.

I've got scars on my thighs, stomach and arms and none has ever noticed that. I bring the blade to my left wrist and drag it along piercing my skin as I do so.

I bring the blade back and pierce my skin again just as the cell door opens and Doreen comes into view, I quickly hide my blade and cover my arm but to my luck I wasn't fast enough "Maddy what are you doing" she asks me as she comes in.

I look away and hide my arm again "Maddy why are you doing that" Doreen asks shutting the door and comes over to me. She roles my sleeves up and sees my arms covered in scars. That's it my secret is out.

"It's the way I cope, when he first" I stop what I was saying and role my sleeves down "when he first raped me, it was 5 and 1/2 months ago, I was being bullied at school as well and didn't know what to do" I continue "then I noticed I was getting bigger,  
but it couldn't be because I was eating loads because the truth is since Franky was locked up 6 years ago I had stopped eating." I mumble turning away

"Mum would spend all the money on Drugs and alcohol, I would steal from shops just for food. Probably once a week I would steal untill i got caught but that didn't stop me" I tell her and she nods reassuring me.

"You don't have to go on" Doreen tells me "so when I was raped by the bloke I wanted to give up but I didn't, instead I continued to self harms, the bullying at school was just as bad as it had been in the past, I had assaulted a teacher because i had  
got angry because they were also picking on me, I then murdered the bloke but the police didn't know about that untill a few days before I murdered mum." I explain and sigh

"Well we won't judge you in here, and about you said you thought you were getting bigger, do you think theirs a chance off you being pregnant?" Doreen suggests to me and I shrug, "well I had been sick a few times but that was like 2, 3 months ago" I answer

Doreen looks at me and nods "the looks off things you may be pregnant" she tells me and I frown "I'm 17, in here and might be pregnant, great" I say sarcastically and Doreen smiles "whatever happens you know you'll have your sister and I'm always here  
if you need to talk I've had kids myself" Doreen tells me

It was soon time for dinner and Doreen tells me about Evreything as we walk with Evreyone else.

At dinner I felt eyes on me and I didn't like it, Franky And myself were talking and she told me who to avoid and who not to avoid, she told me that I should never push the panic button.

I listened to everything that she was telling me and we all sat down at the table. I had a pain in my stomach but i didn't say anything because it was nothing, or so I think.

"Maddy had you heard from dad since I've been in here?" Franky asked me and I shake my head. He hadn't been in contact or so mum told me. I push the food around the tray having another pain in my stomach. I had them over the last few months but I just  
ignore it.

After a while we were all sent back to our cells for the count. Franky told me that we all stand outside our cells and they count us to make sure we're all their and Evreything like that.

We were all counted and then went into our cells, I shut the door and got my blade out once again today and I bet you can guess it, I brought it to my wrist a few times before putting the blade back into my photo and then cried myself to sleep.

That night I woke up screaming to another nightmare, "Maddy, Maddy, Maddy" I hear Franky say as she shook me and I wake up crying and trying to get away "it's alright you'll be alright" she reassures me "what was your nightmare about?" Franky asked me.

She must have guessed it was a nightmare "it was the night when he raped me, Evrey night it's the same" I cry into my sisters shoulder . She lays me down and lays beside me settling me down and wrapped her arms around me untill I fell asleep..


	3. Chapter 3

Mandy's PoV

The next morning I woke up in the same place as I did the previous night, well not the previous night, when I woke up from the nightmare, great way to start my time here.

My sister was still next to me and asleep, but everyone would if they were woken up by screaming at God knows what time in the night. I felt Franky move next to me and she sits up "you alright Mads?" She asks me and I shake my head "I can't help  
but think about things, I've been having pains in my stomach aswell the nightmares I have every single night" I tell Franky softly.

"Hey hey you don't have to go through this alone, you have me back now" Franky tells me giving me a small kiss on my cheek and I fake a small smile in response to her

"a year after you got sent down i blocked Evreyone out, I started falling behind at school and I came home every night with bruises from school and most nights mum would be drunk and under the influence of drugs and she would take her anger out on me"  
I tell my older sister out of the blue I just needed to get it off my chest and tell someone.

"That bitch, how dare she lay a finger on my baby sister" Franky whisper shouts. "I finally lost it with her and that's why she's dead" I cry into my sisters side. It was the early hours of the morning but I didn't care.

Franky kept her arm around me as I cried but before I knew it I had fallen asleep, crying.

I was soon awoken again with another nightmare "it's okay Maddy, I'm here" Franky soothes as the cell door opens to reveal oh what's her name oh yes that's right it's Liz "Bea was wondering where you had got to" Liz says to Franky and she nods

"Maddy needed me last night" Franky told her and she nodded "we heard the shouting" Liz says to my sister and leaves, Franky gets up "see you in a minute baby" Franky tells me kissing my cheek once more before leaving my cell. I sit their in silence and  
look at my arm.

Their was dry blood from last night, it was lucky Franky hadn't seen, if she did I would have been questioned by her. I slide my sleeves down and stand up before walking out and joining Evreyone else in the main area.

Bea was over by a kettle making cups of tea, boomer was sat on the sofa while Liz, Doreen, Maxien and Franky were sat at a table. Franky patted the chair beside her and I sat down. I was still fiddling with my sleeves and felt highly uncomfortable, iv  
been trying to ignore my autism pushing its way out making me not want to be in new situations and meet new people but I felt overwhelmed and soon dashed back to my cell.

I calmed myself down after I had became flappy and was joined by Franky and Doreen. "What happened back their?" Doreen asked me and I flapped slightly "you became overwhelmed didn't you Maddy?" Franky asked me seeing I was flappy

"The perks of having autism" I mumble "I am extremely bad at keeping eye contact, I'm not exactly good at meeting people well new people, new situations panic me" I explain only a few things to Doreen who knew hardly anything about my condition.

Franky came and held my hands to stop me from flapping and she tried to calm me down. "Maddy breath slowly" she tells me softly and I do so breathing in through my nose out through my mouth "that's it keep doing that" Franky tells me and I continue doing  
so.

"If I'm not around this is what you've got to do to stop her flapping, if none stops her she has a panic attack" Franky tells Doreen "we should tell the others" Doreen suggests "incase neither me or you are with her" she says after that and Franky nods.

"You alright to come out now baby" Franky asks wrapping her arms around me and I do the same to her "I promise you that they won't hurt you" Franky reassured me so I nod slowly, she keeps her arm around me as we go and sit down once again.

"What was that all about?" boomer asked and I look to Franky "I have autism like Franky told you yesterday" I say quitely but loud enough for people to hear me "she's is really bad in new situations and with new people and she can't do eye contact" Franky  
continues

"I become flappy and start to panic, that's why I dashed off, I was flappy" I say to the women "what do you mean flappy?" Maxien asked me and I demonstrated by flapping my arms "if she's like this and me or Doreen aren't about then you but take  
her by the hands, and say softly to her 'Maddy breath slowly' and then when she's breathing slowly you softly say again 'that's it, keep doing that'" Franky tells the rest "if she doesn't get calmed then she would most likely have a panic attack"  
Franky finishes off

Franky looks at me, I was fiddleing with my sleeves "sorry if I woke any off you last night" I mumble whisper to Evreyone and they say it's alright while Doreen gives me a look as to say 'do you want to talk about it' and I shake my head.

The unit was soon unlocked and we all headed to breakfast, Franky was on duty this morning so I stayed with Bea, Doreen and the rest off the unit as we headed to the cafeteria.

"So Maddy when's your birthday?" Liz asks me trying to make small talk "25th July" I tell her and she nods as we arrive at the cafeteria and get our breakfast. Doreen said after we had finished she would show me where everything is properly because I  
only knew where the unit and obviously the cafeteria was.

I bet she was only going to show me places i needed to know to ask me about my nightmare but I don't have to tell her do I, I don't have to tell what my nightmare is about.

We finished eating and soo left the others "new blood" a woman sat at a table shouts but Doreen tells me to ignore her "that's Lucy, stay away from her" Doreen tells me as we walk back to our unit, "most of us in here call her Juicy" I was curious why  
but didn't ask.

We made our way back to the unit and then she started showing me around "do you mind me asking what your nightmare was about last night?" Doreen asks me and I look down almost walking into a wall, luckily enough Doreen pulled me around the corner making  
sure I didn't.

"It's the same one I have every night. It's the night when I was raped, back at home mum used to come into my room and shout at me and have ago at me when I woke up screaming but that wouldn't make the nightmares go away." I start

"When Franky came into me last night it felt like before she was sent down, when she would comfort me and tell me it was all going to be okay" I tell her and she nods "I think you would benefit by seeing the councillor" Doreen suggest.

Immediately I shake my head as a no. "The last time I spoke to a counsellor it ended in disaster" I mumbled. You remember when I told you I assaulted teachers at school, well one was the school counsellor and I had to spend a night it the police station.

"What happened?" Doreen asked me and I shake my head not wanting to tell her and I was happy when she dropped the subject and continued showing me places I should know

She showed me the showers, yard which I guess is basically where we go at a certain time of day but what do I know... Everywhere was shown and I kinda remembered placed that were important. "We've got chores in a hour" she tells me and I nod

We both head back to the unit and I clutch my stomach in pain "are you alright Maddy" Liz asks me as me and Doreen sit down. I nod unconvincingly "your not alright are you?" Liz asks. I shake my head in the end giving in, knowing I wasn't actually alright

If I was pregnant then it would be 3 and half months untill the baby would be here, I know that much. I place my hands on my stomach and feel the pain again. I may be wrong but it might feel like a kicking baby "Maddy what's wrong" Doreen asks me

"I keep getting a pain in my stomach" I respond simply and she nods as she puts a hand on my stomach and smiles at me "that's a baby kicking" she tells me in a whisper and I look at her wide eyed.

I couldn't have a baby I'm only 17, not only that I'm in here too, this baby deserve better than me as its mother.

I couldn't take it in, how come I didn't figure this out before now, yeah my period has never been regular but I should have realised if I was pregnant, yeah I have been putting on weight.

"I know nothing about children, let alone babies" I mumble doreen pulls me into a weird sideways hug just as Franky comes up behind me "Franky can I talk to you?" I ask my older sister and she nods. "Well you know I told you about everything that has  
happend but Doreen said he pains I've been having in my stomach are a baby's kick" I explain and Franky looks just as shocked as I did.

"In going to be a aunt?" She asks making sure she heard me right and I nod slowly and unsteadyly "I'm only 17, I can't have this baby" I say and Franky smiles at me softly

"You can Mads, your the strongest 17 year old I know, you've been through a lot more than anyone your age has and your still fighting through, I know you'll be a great mother, anyone would be better than our mother anyway" Franky tells me whispering the  
end part making me smile

I knew now that I was able to look after the baby, even if I'm only 17 and in prison for murder I know I can look after this kid no matter what what people tell me.

Hi guys

Jess here, I'm so sorry my writing is so shit and I'm portraying Evreyone wrong, I'm an awful writer I know but I am actually enjoying writing this fanfiction so i hope your enjoying the story.

Well that's it for now

Bye x


	4. Chapter 4

I'm just skipping a month ahead in the story, I know start kinda a big skip but I've got a storyline I want to write and your proberly be able to guess it, but that's going to be the next chapter or something like that

Thank you Lex036 for your review it means a lot that you enjoy this story, I'm trying my hardest to make sure my spellings are correct but it is really hard with dyslexia

Jess

Mandy's PoV

I've been in here for a month now and I must admit it's not as bad as i thought it would be, a lot off the woman have found out I'm Frankys sister and apparently they shouldn't mess with her so they won't mess with me.

I've gotten bigger in the last month but that's what happens when your pregnant, right?. I turn 18 in just over 1 month and I would get my exam results in 2 months I only hope they send them here, otherwise I would never find out my results.

I had a restless night last night and was tossing and turning all while being kicked by the baby. I also had the same nightmare But I didn't scream or cry this time, I kept my emotions bottled up, both Franky and Doreen have said I should see the prison  
Councillor but I wasn't sure.

Franky told me that she won't hurt me and that she's spoken to her a few times but whenever they brought the subject up I instantly changed the subject.

I was the only one awake, sat in my cell thinking, about baby names, about if it would help me if I spoke to someone, and just about anything in particular.

If your wondering yes I do still harm myself but I make sure none knows or notices, I made that mistake once and Doreen keeps asking me if I've done it since. The thing she doesn't know is I do, but not on my arms.

On my thighs and stomach the two places they will never know off 'oh shit' I think to myself, i realised they would find out on my thighs when I give birth, that's if it happens over night.

I hear the others wake up and I guess leave their cells but I stay where i was, thinking. I was trying to come to my own conclusion to if I should talk to someone and if it would help me.

I wanted to give up with everything if I'm honest. "Mads you coming out" I hear my sister say from the door. I don't answer I just keep thinking "what you thinking about?" She then asks me and I look up at her

"Franky I think I do need to talk to someone, like you and Doreen think" I tell my sister in bearly a whisper "if your sure Mads" Franky smiles coming over to me and sitting down.

"I'm sure, I need to do this, I think" I my sister with a small nod. "Well I've got a session with her later I will talk to her if you want?" Franky asked me and I nod.

I got changed into my uniform when my sister left. We were soon counted and went to breakfast.

At breakfast it was the same as it had always been, boring. After breakfast I wanted a shower and collected my things from my cell and then headded to the showers, Franky usually comes with me to keep me safe but I don't need her to keep me safe.

Yeah I'm pregnant and I have autism but i can take care off myself, I have her attitude after all.

I was the only one in the showers untill what's her name oh yeah Lucy who everyone calls juicy and her gang walks in. I role my eyes. As she starts to talk to me and then all of a sudden I was pushed up against the sinks but that didn't stop me fighting  
back.

I elbowed her before turning around and punching her, I had lost it. I was punching and kicking her and before I knew it Miss Bennett was soon pulling me off and I was kicking and screaming

"Put her in the slot" miss Bennett tells Mr Jackson. I was still kicking and screaming, we passed Franky and she looks at me as if to say what happened

I was taken through the prison and put in a cell and the door was locked. Great.

I paced back and forth with my hands on my stomach, I could feel my little baby kicking but all I could think about was what had happened back their, what was I ment to do, just let her rape me. It was all to familiar.

I role up my sleeve and claw at my wrist, I've got longish nails and can always use them to hurt myself instead off my blade

Frankys pov

I saw Maddy being dragged kicking and screaming away, "miss Bennett" I asked as she walked past "what is it Franky?" She responded

"well I was just wondering if you could tell me why my sister is being taken off dragging and screaming?" I asked and for a look as if to say she's your sister "wait Maddison is your sister?" She asked me and I nodded while rolling my eyes "it's obvious  
isn't it Franchesca Doyle, Maddison Doyle" I say with a smirk

"I found her attacking Lucy" miss Bennett tells me and I looked shocked, it turns out Maddy does have my attitude and my violence "do you know why? Maddy wouldn't just attack someone for fun" I defend my pregnant little sister.

"We are unsure of the reasons right now" miss Bennett tells me and I sigh "she's pregnant you know, her hormones are all over the place" I respond defending her but that doesn't change anything.

I head back to the unit and try and figure out why Maddy would attack Juicy, then it hit me, she was trying to rape my sister. I've taught Mads so well, but why didn't she do that when the bloke raped her, I'll never know.

I soon had to be taken to my session with Bridget Westfall also known as the prison psychiatrist or counsellor, you call it what you like.

I was still going to see if she could make an appointment to talk to Maddy because Maddy asked me too and I don't break my promise to my little sister, I never have and never will, okay maybe once when I told when I would be back and well I ended up in  
here but other than that never have I ever lied to my sister

I was excorted to her office and sat down next to her "so how are things today Franky?" Bridget asks me and i shrug to start with "well  
My sisters just been slotted, she's 6 and a half months pregnant and the stress isn't good on her" I say even Though my sisters stress wasn't anything to do with me.

"Would that be Maddison Doyle by any chance?" I was asked and I nod "don't call her that, none ever does its Maddy, with a Y not IE" I tell Bridget and she nods "she's been through more than I have, me and Doreen both have tried to convince her to get  
an appointment to talk to you" I continue to tell her and she nods

"And what has she said to that?" Bridget soon asks me "well this morning she said she thinks we're right that it would help her and she said she wants to" I tell her and she nods.

We continue the session untill the end "I'll see if I could talk to Maddy while she's in the slot, do you know why she's their" I was asked and I nod explaining what happened before I was excorted back to the unit.

In the unit I was asked where Maddy was and i told everyone she had been slotted because she beat up juicy. The girls cheered and laughed when I told them, we all hated Lucy and we're happy someone finally put her in her place.

Doreen take me to one side "is Maddy going to talk to miss Westfall" she asks me and I nod "miss Westfall is going to try and talk to her, it's whether or not Maddy responds it the answer to it all" I reply

I just hope my little sister is okay

Maddys PoV

It seemed as if I had been in her for ages when the door was finally opened and a woman walked in "I'm Bridget Westfall and I'm the psychologist in here" she introduces herself to me and I nod

"Your sister Franky has told me all about you, she said you wouldn't just attacked someone so what happened?" miss Westfall asks me and I look down fiddleing with my now bloody sleeve

"She was trying to rape me, just like he did" I mumble making the floor look interesting "who did? Who was the he?" She asks me and i shrug, I didn't know his name "the bloke I killed" I say and Bridget nots

"I can't unsee what he did to me, Evrey night it repeats in my head, and this baby is all a reminder off it" I say holding tears back. "What if we set up weekly sessions, and you could talk about it?" She asks me and I slowly nod.

She then looks down at my sleeves seeing that I have been fiddleing with them the whole time she's been here "what's happened their" she asked me in her soft tone. Do I tell her i self harm as a way of coping, no dont. I tell myself.

"It was just a graze" I lie but she doesn't seem convinced "show me your arms" miss Westfall tells me and I knew I couldn't get out off this one. I start rolling my sleeves up and reveal old and new scars.

"How long have you been self-harming?" She asks me and I think back to the first time I harmed myself

It was 7 years ago, before Franky got locked away, a year before to be exact. The bullying st school had gotten too much and mum said I was no good to anyone so I did the only thing I could think off, well not the only thing.

"7 years, a year before Franky was sent in here" I admit and she nods "who else knows about it" Bridget asked me and I knew off only 2 people, well four if you include us two "Doreen and Franky, aswell as you" I nod "Franky has been making sure I don't  
do it and it was all fine" I lie, I wasn't going to show my thighs or stomach which have plenty of scars old and new.

Miss Westfall nods and tells me she will schedule a appointment for two days time because I should be out off here by then and I nod. "And don't stress yourself out, it's no good for the baby" she smiles at me and I nod. I knew that anyway

She soon left and once again I was on my own.


	5. Chapter 5

Thank you again to Lex036 your support is so amazing, it makes me smile for your reviews and your one off the reasons why I do this.

Mandy's pov

It's been two long days since I had been slotted and today finally I'm going back to the unit. I'm almost 7 months pregnant, only a week and 2 days to go. The kicking is driving me mad but I know it will be worth it when the baby's here.

Today is my session with Bridget and boy was I looking forward to it. NOT. It ment talking and I don't do talking. When I say I don't do talking I mean to counsellors or psychologists. But I do want to get better and stop these nightmares which have became  
daymares to.

I hate seeing that night. I hate feeling the way I do. I just hate it all. I was collected from the cell and excorted back to the unit. I had a feeling my baby was going to be a girl but it might be a boy I just had to wait.

Back on the unit I get a cheer from the other women "you put juicy in her place" Bea smiled over to me and i look shocked, then Franky comes over "you really are like a Mini me" she smiles to me and I laugh slightly. "You wouldn't have me any other way"  
I laugh and Franky pulls me into a hug.

"Thank for being the best big sister Franky" I smile to my sister, she is the best big sister even if she's been in here for the past 6 years she is still my inspiration. "Mads you know I'm always going to be here for you, help you and make you smile"  
Franky tells me.

I skipped lunch today, I wasn't hungry but I was in pain, as much as I love the baby already I hate the pain I'm  
getting "so have you thought of any names yet?" Liz asks me and I nod "if it's a girl I would like to name her Paisley Louise or Mackenzie Annabelle" I started "and if it's a boy I kinda like the name Brooklyn Lee or Ashley Dean" I tell them "but I might  
change my mind before it gets here" I admit

"What do you think it is" Maxien asks me and I shrug "I think it's a girl bit theirs all the chances it could be a boy, I've just got to wait 2 months 1 week and 2 day" I smile. When I'm 7 and a half months pregnant I'll be 18 so when my baby comes I  
won't be a kid anymore..

"Their all nice names" Liz tells me and I smile weakly. I hope I was going to become a good mum but I doubt it. We had chores now and but I was taken of, it's my session with Bridget "good luck Mads" Franky says to me knowing where I was going.

I was lead through the prison and into an office room. It had two chairs set out next to each other at a slight angle. "Good afternoon Maddy" Bridget Westfall greets me and "afternoon" I smiled. I may have been fake but she didn't need to know that.

"So how are you feeling today?" She asked me "tired, this little monkey won't stop kicking" I mumble "you don't have long left do you?" Bridget asked me and I shake my head "2 months 1 week 2 days" I say putting my right hand on my stomach.

"and the nightmares?" Bridget asks me. I stand up and move away, I look out off the window. "Maddy?" Bridget asks me.

"Are the nightmares still happening?" She asks me and I blink away a few tears. "Their not only nightmares" I say with fear in my voice "I see them in the day now, it's like Daymares" I say. "Since Lucy tried to, you know, rape me. I've seen the night  
that he raped me" I mumble.

I had tears in my eyes and they threatened to spill. "Maddy what happens in the nightmares?" Bridget asks me and I stare out the windows. "It's when I was raped, not only that when its when mum came home drunk or when she was off her head and she would  
just have a go at me for nothing" I start by telling her

"She keeps saying it my fault Franky was sent down for assaulting that man. She was saying that Franky never cared about me, that none cared about me" I say trying to not cry. "From what I heard Franky Adores you" Bridget tells me.

I take a deep breath but that doesn't stop the tears from deciding they want to fall. I turn around and lean against the wall "whatever I do I still see everything" I explain to Bridget "these sessions should help with that, they've helped  
your sister" Bridget tells met

"Are you sure?" I ask her and she nods "every week if you need" she tells me and I smile.

I was soon lead out the office and l was lead to the unit before I headed out to the yard. I saw Franky playing a one on one basketball with one off the other women here.

"You alright shorty" Bea jokes and I nod, it was obviously a lie because my eyes were bloodshot and I had tear stained cheeks. Bea looks at me and gives me the are you serious look "fine I'm not" I admit but not telling her what was wrong.

"Is it the baby stress?" Bea asks and I nod even though it was more than that. "It's not as hard as it seems" bea tells me. "Of corse, all they do is eat, sleep and poop" I say sarcastically

Free time was soon over and we headded back to the unit. Franky was asking me how my session went and I told her how it went.

"Maddy have you been crying?" Franky asks me once were back at the unit and I nod slowly. What a baby am I 18 years old in a less than a month an im Crying "it's alright Maddy, you've been strong for so long" Franky tells me putting her arm around me  
and I smile

"Want a cuppa?" I ask the girls in the unit and they say yes, I get the cups and boil the kettle I make the teas and give them to everyone.

"Thanks Maddy" i get from the girls I sit down cross legged on the sofa And drink my own tea. A wave off sickness suddenly overwhelmed me and I had no clue why but ignored it.

"You coming to come to tea with us?" Franky asks me and I shake my head, I didn't want to eat, I knew it wasn't healthy for the baby but I felt so sick and didn't dare eat otherwise I would probably throw it back up.

They went to tea and I went into my cell, I shut the door and pulled my trousers down, grabbed my blade and put the blade against my skin dragging it along and watching it bleed. I only hoped none would come in while I was doing this. They didn't need  
to know I'm still self harming

-Flashback-

I was walking home, I had spent the day with the boy I like but we were also with a group of other people.

It was late and dark but I didn't want to get a taxi. And then suddenly I was pulled into an allyway and that's where it happened.

-end off flashback-

I can't unsee that and it hurts more and more every time I see it. I pull my trousers back up and curled up in a ball on the bed and cried.

I just want to forget everything... But I can't


	6. Chapter 6

Maddys PoV

It's been 2 months since I've been in here, today's my 18th but that's not important, I'm also 7months pregnant today.

My bump is quite big, the kicking has been even bad, mostly at night the baby keeps me awake. It is going to be just like when the baby is here.

It was early in the morning when I started to get a pain in my stomach, it felt nothing like the baby kicking. Their was more off them and the pain, well that seemed a lot worse than a baby's kick. I groan in pain and I must admit it was alittle  
too loud.

"Fuck" groan as another pain comes. What the fuck was this pain. I couldn't be going into labour could i? I'm only 7 months, but you hear of babies coming early all the time don't you.

I get off my bed and walk out off my cell, another excruciating pain strikes and I let out a groan

"Maddy what's going on" I hear Franky say from the doorway of her cell and then Doreens voice speaks "Maddy are you okay?" She asks me and I groan once more as the pain comes again.

I just wanted to scream 'do I look like I'm fucking okay' but I stopped myself from doing so. "It's not the baby kicking and it's to early for me to be going into labour" I cry and Franky comes over to where I was standing I groan as another pain shoots  
through my stomach

"Maddy breath for me" Doreen tells me and I breath "I think you might be going into labour" she tells me and I cry out as another excruciating pain strikes "I can't be its to early" I cry out. Soon enough the whole unit were up and I couldn't help by  
apologies for waking them all.

I gripped Frankys hand tight on each pain. Bea figures out that I'm going it to labour but my waters hadn't broke. "Alright Maddy we need you to breath nice and slowly for us" Bea tells me and I nod and breath slowly in through my nose out through  
my mouth.

This pain was the worst I've ever felt "we need medical help" Liz tells the girls "we can't help Maddy give birth on our own" she then mentions, I guess she's right they can't help me give birth. I squeezed Frankys left hand really tight as the pain strikes  
again, Doreen told me their contractions.

"I don't fancy a broken hand here mads" Franky joke but I wasn't in the mood for jokes, like would you when your in labour but your waters haven't broken, no I didn't think so. I couldn't just lay about I stood up clutching my stomach "what are you doing?"  
Maxien asks me when I was fully stood.

"Standing, it's too uncomfortable" I groan in pain, "fuck this, i just want the baby to come already" I cry, I had enough of this already. "You need to stay calm, keep your breathing steady" Bea tells me and obviously I do so

The pains got even more unbearable making me unable to stand any longer. It was still the early hours off the morning when we all hear a voice at the main gates. They all look over to see who I was where as I groan in pain.

I don't have a clue what was asked but I hear Liz tell whoever was their that I had gone into labour but my my waters hadn't broken, all I could really think about was the baby, that I was going on be a mum soon and the baby was coming on the same day  
as my birthday.

"I'll go and call the nurse" I hear but I just can't be asked to think who was saying it, I don't remember meeting whoever the nurce is "the nurse is Lee Radcliffe" Franky Whispers to me softly. Why did this baby have to come today, why not tomorrow or  
next month or even in two months time when its ment to.

"Your doing great Maddy" Franky in corages me. I see miss Bennett come into the unit "miss Radcliffe said she will be here in a maximum of half an hour,, she told me to get Maddy to the medical room" miss Bennett tells the girls as if I'm not their.

"Don't leave me Franky" I beg my sister not to make me do this without her, I was working myself up and my breathing was all over the place. "I'll be waiting right here when you comeback with the little princess or the little prince" Franky tells me holding  
my hand which I was squeezing

"What if I bring her down? Can I do that?" Franky asks miss Bennett "only the peer support worker would be allowed to do that" miss Bennett tells my sister and Doreen looks at me "want me to come with you?" She asks me and I nod slowly squeezing Frankys  
hand again. "I'll be waiting to see the little one" she smiles kissing my forehead.

Both Doreen and Franky help me up but i double over as soon as a contractions takes over my body making me cry out "make me a even prouder big sister" Franky smiles to me once more.

I grabbed Doreens hand and she let me as herself and miss Bennett took me to the medical room. I wasn't ready for this. "Can I stay? I've had my own baby I could help Maddy with her breathing" Doreen suggests and miss Bennett looks unsure. I could see  
in her eyes that she was thinking. Her eyes also said that it would be against the rules but I didn't care about the rule

" letting you stay would be against the rules" miss Bennett tells Doreen and I groan uncomfortablely "fuck the rules, Maddy is only 18" Doreen mentions to miss Bennett before tuning to me "happy birthday by the way Maddy" she smiles as I squeezed her  
hand tight

"Sorry" I mumble letting go and she smiles to me "you've nothing to be sorry for" she tells me with a little laugh.

Before we knew it the time had flew by and it was 9:30 in the morning, Doreen won't leave me and I still hadn't given birth. I was so tired not only off the pain but I was tired of waiting, I just wanted my baby to be here already.

"Dor, go you haven't eaten and it looks like I'll be here for ages" I groans in pain. "I don't care, Franky can't be with you so I will, I'm not letting you go through this alone" Doreen tells me while letting me squeeze her hand whenever I get a contraction.

Their was a knock at the door to the medical room and I glance over and see my sister "I've just came to see how things are going" she smiled when nurce Radcliffe opens the door

"Still no baby" I sigh "the baby will  
Be here in no time mads, just stay strong" Franky smiles coming over to me and holding my other hand. "I don't care what the governor or Miss Bennett say, im here to help my sister get through the birth" Franky announces I smile while squeezing both Franky  
and Doreens hands.

It must have been another four hours into the day when my waters had finally broken and I was almost ready to push "okay Maddy on your next contraction I need you to push" nurse Radcliffe tells me. I didn't think I could do it, I'm too tired "you can  
do this Maddy" both Doreen and my sister Franky tell me.

"Breath like me" Doreen tells me and I do well up untill I get a contraction I scream out in pain as I begin to push "your doing really well" nurse Radcliffe reassures me as I push again.

Gosh giving birth is hard work, I think to myself. Five minutes later nurse Radcliffe told me one last push and my baby would be here so I put all my efforts into the push and then the room was filled with crying "congratulations it's a little girl" nurse  
Radcliffe tells me and I frown, the pains still were here.

My little girl was all cleaned up and placed down while nurse Radcliffe came over to me "it looks like your having twins" she tells me and I sigh, I'm too tired, I couldn't go on "you can do this Maddy, one beautiful baby girl and then this little one  
will be just as beautiful" Franky smiles kissing my forhead.

Before I knew it I was pushing again, it didn't take as long to deliver the second baby but it was here "it's a boy" nurse Radcliffe tells me and I look up to my sister "a little girl and boy" i smile with tears in my eyes.

Both my baby's were cleaned up and brought over to me "do you know what your going to name them?" Doreen asks me and i think back to when I told everyone the names I liked "well I thought Mackenzie Paisley-Lou Doyle for the girl" I start looking down  
to my left arm where my daughter was.

"And for the boy maybe Brooklyn Dean Doyle" I say looking to the right "lovely names for gorgeous baby's" Doreen smiles "I'll go and tell the girls the baby's are here, and I'll sort your cell out if you like" she asks me and I nod. "Would auntie Franky  
like to hold her niece or nephew?" I ask my big sister and she gently takes Brooklyn "hello mr, I'm your aunt, the only other family member that's going to be important in your life" Franky says to my son.

What she was saying was true, me, Mackenzie and Franky were the only important family Brooklyn has and it's the same for Mackenzie the only important family for her is me, Brooklyn and Franky.

Soon enough miss Bennett was here. Me and Franky had to go back to our unit. I let Franky hold it be twins while I got up from the bed "Maddy I may need to do tests on the twins to make sure all is well and the same with you, so could you come back tomorrow  
with them?" Nurse Radcliffe asks me and I nod.

I carry the twins back to the unit in the towels and get welcomed back and the twins get welcomed to the unit "Maddy their adorable" I hear boomers say and I smile "thank you" I say with a yawn "so what have you named them" Mackenzie Paisley-Lou Doyle  
and Brooklyn Dean Doyle" I announced.

Doreen comes out off her cell with baby clothes "I got my partner to bring some clothes in for you, their are girl things here but theirs mostly boys" Doreen tells me and I smile "thank you" I say with tears in my eyes, I was so emotional.

Doreen soon opens the door to my cell with what's shut and told me to come over so I do. I walk into the cell and see a cot with two teddies in "we got this sorted before you came back, the teddies for the twins" Doreen tells me and I smile again.

"Thank you" I repeat. I stick soon comes from the twins and i realised I don't know how to change them "want me to show you how to change them?" Doreen asks me and I nod "yes please" I ask. She gently take Brooklyn from my arm and places him down on the  
bed.

I watch as she explains and shows me how to change a baby before I do the same with Mackenzie. "That's it" she smiles at me. "We have some time before tea why don't you try and have a kip, you've done a lot today" Doreen tells me and I nod

"But first could you call Franky here please" I ask her and nods "If anything happens to me I want Franky to look after the twins, but if anything happens to both me and Franky then Doreen if you would, i would like you to look after them" I ask both  
off them.

They agree making me smile. "We will take the twins our here to meet everyone probably" Franky tells me and I nod. Mackenzie was wearing a pink babygrow and a little cardigan and Brooklyn was wearing a blue babygrow with a little jumper type top and I  
couldn't help but smile.

I sat on my bed before laying down and closing my eyes. From now on the twins are my priority and nothing will change that. Even when I get out off here when their 12 I'm not going to let anyone hurt them.

I was soon awake again because of a stupid nightmare but I got up and saw everyone and my twins "well done Maddy" Bea smiles over to me "Mackenzie looks like you" she tells me but I don't see it. "Thanks Bea" I smile.

It was time for the count before tea so I took the twins and stood in my doorway to the cell and my luck Mackenzie starts to cry "what's up baby" I ask rocking the twins "mummy's here no need to cry" I say softly waiting for the count to be done

'Why are you crying' I think to myself as I rock my children. Doreen leaves her cell door and comes to mine, "I'll hold Brooklyn for you, she might be hungry" Doreen tells me taking Brooklyn from my arm as Mr Jackson arrives for the count.

Doreen takes Brooklyn to her cell and mr Jackson does the count before we were am could go to tea. Doreen takes me into my cell and explains how to breast feeds So I could feed the twins.

After feeding both twins I went to tea with Doreen and my twins. 


	7. Chapter 7

Maddys PoV

Two days after Mackenzie and Brooklyn were born but something has been up with Brooklyn. It's been worrying me and I don't have a clue what's going on. Nurse Radcliffe said everything is fine but it's not, I can tell.

They say when you've had a child it's your mothers instinct which tells you something is wrong with your baby. I was up a few times last night with Mackenzie but Brooklyn had only woke once.

It was now morning and the unit was all up and I sit next to the cot, Mackenzie was asleep but I knew she was going to be waking up soon, I check Brooklyn, he wasn't breathing "come on Brooklyn, please baby you've got to pull through this, Mackenzie needs  
her little brother" I cry trying to bring him round but it doesn't work

I had tears in my eyes and poring down my cheeks "come on brook" I say doing baby CPR on him but he doesn't wake up "noo" I cry. He had to wake up, I know I would still have Mackenzie but he's my son. "Hey babe what's up" I hear Maxien ask as she comes  
into my cell "come on Brooklyn, breath for mummy" I cry ignoring Maxien

"What's happening Maddy" Maxien then asked me "brooklyns not breathing, I knew something was up and none did anything about it" I cry holding my baby boy close "he's dead" I sob

I was meant to protect him but I let him die, I should have known something was wrong. "He was two days old and I didn't save him, I should have done something" I cry. My sons lifeless body in my arms "brooklyn, your sister needs you, she needs her little  
brother" I I say softly to my son even though I knew he wouldn't wake

Frankys pov

Maddy hadn't left her cell this morning and Maxien went to see if she was okay. She had been worrying about Brooklyn all over the last day and she thinks something is wrong with him but none will listen to her

"I think you should go in their" Maxien tells me and I look worried "what's happened?" I ask "it's Brooklyn, he's dead" Maxien tells me and I dash to my sister. "Maddy, Maxien has told me about Brooklyn" I say as I enter my sisters cell.

"Theirs nothing wrong with Brooklyn" Maddy tells me but I could tell she was lieing, "Maddy, brooklyns dead" I tell my sister in a soft quite tone

"Brooklyn is not dead, my baby is not dead" Maddy screams at me placing Brooklyn into the cot "Don't talk about my son the way you did, BROOKLYN IS NOT DEAD" Maddy screams lunging for me.

She would never to that, she would normally talk to me. "Maddy calm down" I try to calm my 18 year old sister "BROOKLYN IS NOT DEAD! Hes fine" my sister says and I leave her.

"Is Maddy alright?" Bea asks me and I shake my head, "Brooklyn looked lifeless but she didn't want to admit it" I say worried about my sister. I heard my neice cry and I guess Maddy was dealing with her.

Maddys pov

I knew Brooklyn was dead but I just couldn't come to terms with it. I lashed out at my sister. I punch the wall and it wakes Mackenzie up "oh mack, do you understand what's going on?" I ask my baby girl who just looks at me. I sit on my bed and feed my  
baby girl.

Once I had fed Mackenzie I burp her before changing her, I was soon joined again by Franky "mads, I know you don't want to admit this but brooklyns gone" Franky tells me and I gently place mack down next to her brother

"Right you listen to me, Brooklyn is not dead, he's fine and if you say he's not then you will regret it" I say in a threatening tone. I wasn't thinking straight and I knew I wasn't "Maddison Doyle calm the fuck down" my sister tells me and I clutch a  
fist.

Instead of punching Franky I punch the wall next to her. "Right I'll take Mackenzie and I'll let you calm down" Franky says going over to the cot and picks her up.

Frankys PoV

I took Mackenzie and left Maddy to calm down, I checked Brooklyn while I was their and saw he wasn't breathing or moving which meant he was dead.

Maddy wasn't thinking straight, she wasn't herself. "What are you doing with Mackenzie?" Doreen asks me and I look to Maddys cell "Brooklyn is dead, you know the shouting well Maddy was telling me he wasn't she's not thinking straight" I say softly as  
I rock my neice.

"She looked like she wanted to hit me, she's never been like that towards me" I say "I'm sure when it's sunk in she will be alright" Doreen trys telling me but I didn't really know what to do or say.

We continue talking and Maddy walks out carrying Brooklyn "Brooklyn wanted his sister, I think he missed her" Maddy fakes a smile as she walks over to where I was sat. You could tell that my nephew wasn't alive any more. "Look Brook its you sister it's  
kenzie" she says brining Brooklyn over.

"Maddy can I hold Brooklyn?" Doreen asks her and she looks down at her son before she reluctantly lets her hold him. She looked like she knew what she was doing so I let her "he looks like you Maddy, so dose Mackenzie" Doreen says to my sister

She looked over to me and nodded. "Maddy honey sit down" Doreen tells my sister and she does so "right I know you may not want to believe this but Brooklyn he's gone, he's in a better place now, nothing can hurt him now" Doreen trys to tell Maddy and  
then she looses it.

"He's not dead" Maddy screams trashing the unit, she had tears streaming down her cheeks and I just wanted to hug her and tell her it will all be alright, that she still has me and kenzie. "He's not dead! He's just asleep" she screams

The screws walk by and notice and come in immediately "what's going on in here" miss miles asks but she gets no answers, all she saw was Maddy trashing the place while screaming and crying. "He's not dead" Maddy screams again punching the wall.

She gently takes Brooklyn from Doreens arms and then Mackenzie from mine, miss miles looks at Maddy, I knew what she was thinking, she was going to slot Maddy. I look at my sister who was now crying while holding her children.

"We're going to have to slot you" miss miles tells me sister who glares at her "I'll look after the twins" I tell my sister as I take Mackenzie and Brooklyn from her arms. Maddy was shaking and it was awful seeing her like this. Miss miles goes to take  
her away but she kicks off "stay the fuck away from me" she growls stepping back.

Well Atleast she's trying to protect Evreyone from her anger I think.

Maddys PoV

I got angry and started trashing the unit, I wasn't thinking straight and couldn't contain my anger any longer. All I wanted was my son to be well and alive again was that too much to ask. Well yeah you can't do that but his sister will need him; she  
won't be able to cope on her own.

Miss miles said that she's going to slot me and I knew if she was to excort me down at this moment then I would flip."stay the fuck away from me" I growl stepping back.

"Back up required" she announces into her radio and soon enough their was mr Jackson and miss Bennett and a bunch of others at the unit I was grabbed by two off them and you might have guessed I was kicking trying to get free, I needed my son "he's in  
a better place now Maddy" Franky calls to me as I'm dragged off "he's not fucking dead" I scream and hear Mackenzie crying

"We will need to sedate her" I hear miss Bennett says and I was kicking and fidgeting to get free and surprisingly I did. I legged it back to the unit and saw Mackenzie in Frankys arms but Brooklyn was nowhere to be seen. I grab my daughter gently from  
my sisters arms and settled the crying baby

"Mummy's here, it's alright" I whisper softly to her "Maddy your only making this harder for yourself" miss Bennett says standing only 5 steps away from me "my baby needs me" I say my voice shaking. I felt myself shaking as Mackenzie cried "it's alright  
kenzie mummy's here, mummy won't let anything happen to you" I whisper to my daughter

"Where's Brooklyn" I panic and I see Franky looking over to me nurvesly "maddy, Brooklyn died, remember?" Franky asks me and I frown. I didn't want to believe it.

I was still shaking and Mackenzie was crying "we will look after Mackenzie" Franky tells me and I shake my head "kenzie needs me" I cry before reluctantly handing Mackenzie over to my sister.

Miss Bennett then grabs me, I was distressed and it was obvious and lead me down the corridor, I was trying to fight her off but I don't manage to.

I was put in the slot "miss Westfall will be down to talk to you later" miss Bennett tells me and I role my eyes. "Why'd you do it Maddison" I hear voice say, it wasn't just any though it was mums.

How could she be talking when she's dead. 


	8. Chapter 8

Maddy's pov

Only a few hours after I had been slotted I could still hear mum talking, I heard crying too, brooklyns crying.

I paced back and forth in the cell and punched the wall "just leave me alone" I call out to the voice, it felt so real but their was nothing I could do about it. I knew I was to expect Bridget Westfall soon and if I am quite frank with you I'm not in  
the mood.

If I wasn't in here and at home the I would go for a run or I would do something calming like read, draw, listen to music or I've never admitted this but sing, I'm crap but I still did that to calm down.

"Why'd you do it Maddison" I hear mums voice ask again for like the thousandth time, well thats probably a slight exaggeration.

"Why did you kill me Maddison" mums voice announces and I grip my head "shut up! Shut up!" I scream. I punch the wall off the cell over and over only to be stopped by the cell door being opened. In walks Bridget, great.

"Maddy?" She asks me but I don't turn around "Maddy how are you feeling" she asks me as I stand with my back to her. "I'm fine" I lie and I think Bridget could tell I was lying. "Maddy I've heard what has happened to brooklyn, it's got to be hard on you"  
Bridget mentions and I shake my head "Brooklyn is not dead, he's fine, he's with his auntie Franky and his sister Kenzie" I say with a small nod,

"Maddy he's gone, nurse Radcliffe had a look at him and their was nothing she could do" I was told and I shook my head. I didn't want to believe it but I knew it was true.

"Maddy I could help you?" She says and I shake my head "Maddy, look at Me" Bridget says to me and I hesitantly turn to face her, my eyes were bloodshot, my fists were red from punching the walls and it was obvious that I was distressed

"Mackenzie and Brooklyn need me" I say not looking up. "My baby's need me, their only 2 days old" I sob shaking "right Maddy listen, no mum wants to believe about their children died, you think your meant to protect them but sometimes you can't, Brooklyn  
dyeing wasn't your fault, from what I heard you were fantastic with the pair of them."

I look up facing her and she looks at me "I hear him crying" I whisper "do you hear anyone or anything else" Bridget asks me and I try to avoid the question. I want crazy, it is just stress I keep reassuring myself but i wasn't sure if I could believe  
myself much longer.

"Brooklyn was my son and I did nothing to protect him" I whisper avoiding the question "Maddy do you hear any other voices or anything else?" I was then asked and I then turn around nodding.

"It's mum, she keeps asking why I did it" I say quietly. "It's probably all the stress Maddy" Bridget tells me and I nod slowly

"Maybe what I was thinking is best, give Mackenzie up, she's better off without me, I didn't fight enough to find out what's wrong with Brooklyn and he died." I start "I bet kenzie is better with Franky, when Franky gets parole Mackenzie can go with her,  
she will be better off that way" I continue to say

Bridget looked at me and shook her head "I can tell you don't mean it, you love the twins too much" is when I stopped her talking "their by twins anymore though are they, Brooklyn's gone and I only have Mackenzie now" I say softly

"Times up" mr Jackson announces opening the cell door "could I just have a few more minutes?" Bridget asks him and be looks to the camera in the corner off the room "no sorry" he tell her and she leaves but not before saying we will finish this tomorrow

I was soon locked in again and the voices continued, the screams off mum when I killed her, the crys of Brooklyn at night when he was hungry. I just wanted them to go away.

Who knew having a baby would make you feel like this because for sure I didn't expect to feel like this, I knew it wouldn't be easy but no first mums expect it to be easy. Obviously it's a lot harder when your in prison. I remember when I was first put  
in here I was told I am waiting for a court date and still haven't had that yet.

That would tell me how long I'm in here for,, people have told me it would only be 12 years but I don't know what to think.

I decide since their was nothing to do so I sit on the floor before laying down and doing sit ups. I used to train, I was in a running club and I did sit ups everyday. I even set records for myself to try and beat but I never got really high, my highest  
is about 30 sit ups.

I begin to try and beat my record. "Useless, waist of space, idiot" I hear mums voice shout. Her voice pushes me to push myself and put extra effort into my sit ups.

After a hour or so I decide to stop but I soon regret it as the voice becomes loud again and brooklyns crying comes back.

Frankys PoV

It must be so hard on Maddy, Brooklyn died and we didn't know how. How are you ment to greave for a baby who's only 2 days old.

Maddy didn't want to believe that her son was dead and she lashed out and trashed the place which ended up with her being slotted and me being left with Mackenzie my adorable niece.

Mackenzie was crying and I had no clue why "dor, could you help me? Mackenzie is crying but I honestly don't know why" I ask one off my mates. I didn't know what to do and soon Doreen had came over and helped me with my niece

"We should do something special for Maddy, she must be finding it really hard to grieve as Brooklyn was only 2 days old, we could give him a small service when she comes out" Doreen suggests and I nod hoping my sister was alright..


	9. Chapter 9

Mandy's pov

When your alone thinking isn't the worst thing you can do, but over thinking is. Not only was I doing that i was some how putting myself in danger without even knowing it.

Who knew when your alone in the slot you think so much, you forget what's real and what's fake. The voices in my head have got stronger and brooklyns crying has become louder and theirs nothing I can do to stop them.

It's been 27 hours since I've been slotted, which is 1 day and 3 hours and I've basically given up, I want my baby's back. I guess it's finally sunk in that Brooklyn has gone but I can still see him, when I close my eyes I see his smiling face laying  
next to kenzie in the cot.

My baby's together. It's just so lovely to see but when I open my eyes it's all gone.

I didn't know how to greave for him because he was only 2 days old, I didn't know what to do to make my self feel better. I sat on the floor opposite the camera and faced the corner. I put my head against the wall and cried, I began to claw at my left  
wrist with my nails hoping to forget everything and stop the voices but to my luck the voices continue.

"Just shut up" I moan to mums voice but she doesn't. I close my eyes as i continued to claw my wrist and watch the blood drip onto the floor. I didn't realise someone was standing behind me untill I looked up I saw mr fletcher.

"Right we need to get you to the infirmary" he says and I shake my head. "I don't need to go to the infirmary" I complain. If I go to the infirmary then theirs a higher chance that the voices will be found out.

Yeah Bridget knows but none else does "then governor Ferguson wants to have a little chat with you" mr Fletcher tells me and I shake my head "I'm not going anywhere" I mumble

Fletcher calls for back up and they take me to infirmary. Dr Radcliffe bandages my wrists and then I was excorted to governor Fergusons office. I wonder why she wanted to see me but I didn't let that get to me.

"Your useless, stupid ugly" I hear mums voice once again as we get to the office.

"Take a seat Miss Doyle" Ferguson tells me and I role my eyes and sit down "why am I here" I ask with a confused look on my face "we know your sister is the one getting the drugs in here, we need you to tell us how and when they are coming in?" She asks  
me and I role my eyes "well how am I ment to know that? It's not like I'm a mind reader" I respond with a bit off attitude.

"You find out and we cans make sure you and your daughter are put into protection" Ferguson tells me and I role my eyes once again "can I leave now?" I ask and she gets mr fletcher to take me back to my unit.

Back on the unit Franky was sat cradling Mackenzie "Maddy" Franky smiles and I go over "has kenzie been good for you?" I ask nurvesly and Franky nods.

"You coming out to the yard?" Franky asks me and I nod before taking Mackenzie from my sister and walk with her.

In the yard I see Doreen with Bea, Liz, boomer and Maxien around a table which had a picture of Brooklyn. "I can't do this" I whisper before turning away "Maddy you can do this, doing this will help you say goodbye to him" Franky reasures me and I shake  
my head.

"He's still here Franky, I see him when I close my eyes and I hear his crying. But when i see him he's giggly with Kenzie" I cry softly "baby we will do this together, me you and Mackenzie" Franky tells me and I turn around as she slips her arm around  
my shoulder

"Maddy we though we could do this to help you" Doreen smiles and I weakly smile back

"We are here to celebrate the life off Brooklyn Doyle. Brooklyn was the son of Maddy Doyle, the twin to Mackenzie Doyle and the nephew to Franky Doyle. He didn't have a long life, only two days but in those two days I could tell Maddy loved Brooklyn just  
as much as she loves Mackenzie." Liz begins to say

"I know us in here haven't had a good start in life but none deserves to lose their children. Maddy do you want to say some words?" Liz asks me and I nod slowly.

"When I figured out I was pregnant I didn't know what to expect, I knew babies were hard work but I never expected to have twin. Mackenzie was my first born and then came  
Brooklyn and he was a surprise but I still loved him more than anything" I start with tears welling up in my eyes

"How do you greive someone who had only been born for 2 days, how are you ment to celebrate their life when they never really got a life, because those two questions are ones I don't know how to answer. At first I didn't know I wanted to have a child  
well not untill I was older Atleast but now I've had two I don't think I can cope with losing one off them" I cry. I couldn't hold the tears back any longer.

Franky comes over to me and Mackenzie and pulls me into a gentle hug so she didn't hurt Mackenzie "I'll never forget you Brooklyn. Me, Mackenzie and Auntie Franky love you so much and will never forget you" I cry into my sister

"That was well said Maddy, you will always have us to support you" Liz tells me and I nod still crying.

"Maddison you've got a session with miss Westfall" I am told by mr Jackson and I nod, I cradle my daughter as my Jackson excorts me to Bridget's office.

"Hello Maddy, how are you coping" Bridget asks me and I shrug "pushing through" I tell her "about the voices, what are they saying" Bridget asks me as we continue our conversation from yesterday.

Mackenzie sleeps in my arms as I take a shakely breath "mums telling me I'm useless, stupid and a waist of space. Theirs a lot more she's saying but whatever I do they won't stop." I start with a sigh

"Every time I close my eyes I see Brooklyn laying next to Mackenzie not only that I hear him crying" I say trying not to cry again

"I'm trying to stay strong for Mackenzie because she needs me more than anything now" I whisper.

The session continues and I end up feeling stupid because the voices make me sound like a mental person.

Soon I was back in the unit and I had put Mackenzie down for a nap before closing my eyes so i could not only see Brooklyn but hear him too.


	10. Chapter 10

\- first before I start the chapter I want to say I know nothing about courts so this chapter may be really shit.

Maddys pov

It's been two weeks since the twins were born, 12 days since Brooklyn died and 12 days since I started hearing mums voice and brooklyns crying. in another two weeks then I'll be getting my exam results aswell.

But today I'm in court to find out how long I'm in here for, I'm so nurves. I got out off my bed and picked my crying daughter up "morning baby girl" I say to my little girl as I sit down and begin to breast feed her.

I leave my cell and head into the unit with my daughter. I go over to the kettle and make myself a cuppa while holding my daughter. I felt like I knew what today's outcome was going to be. Mackenzie was crying in my arms and she wouldn't stop, I guess  
she could sense my nurves and sense that I am on edge.

I know I said a few weeks ago that I was going to give her up by I don't think I could now. Mackenzie is my BabyGirl and she needs me to protect her.

I must have been awake with kenzie for about half an hour when Franky walks out her cell "morning Maddy" she says looking over to me and I fake a smile over to her "I know your scared for today, you don't have to fake with me"Franky comes and sits next  
to me on the sofa in the unit and I turn to her still with Kenzie in my arms.

"Maddy, whatever happens our still going to have me and kenzie on your side." Franky says and I rest my head in her shoulder "I know I deserve whatever happens today because i did kill mum and kenzies dad, I just don't know if I'll be able to cope with  
myself and Mackenzie." I start with a shakily voice "Mackenzie needs me to protect her unlike I did with Brooklyn" I say truthfully

"Right listen to me Maddy, you did everything you could to protect Brooklyn and your doing the same with Mackenzie. Your an amazing mum and I knowing yourll be able to take care to both yourself and Mackenzie in here" Franky tells me sturnly and I just  
looked at her blankly.

I didn't know what to say or what to do but luckily Mackenzie began to cry so I got out of responding to my sister. I stood up and went into my cell to change Kenzie and myself. I didn't really want to bring Mackenzie to court with me so Franky offered  
to look after.

I changed Mackenzies nappy before dressing her into a cream baby-grow and a cute pink skirt. I soon dressed myself into a black skirt with a white blouse and a black blazer and obviously my shoes which were just a pair of black flat shoes I put my hair  
into a high go ponytail before leaving my cell with my daughter.

"You'll be fine today" I get reassured by almost Evreyone in the unit but something told me that things weren't going to go well. "Mackenzie shouldn't need feeding but her bottle is in the fridge, nappys are in my cell with spare clothes if needed" I  
say trying to avoid thinking about today.

I carried Mackenzie Down to breakfast and I only had a slice of toast because trust me I should never eat when I'm nerves. "Hey where's that smile I love of yours" my sister asks me poking my sides and I plaster it into my face "better" I say cheekily

Franky laughs at me slightly and nods. Mackenzie was doing her cheeky sweet smile in my arms and I couldn't help but smile at her she ment the world to me and everything she did is perfect.

Franky took Mackenzie from me when I had to leave and wished me luck but luck never works. I was lead to the exit before being cuffed and put in the back of a van. None knew I was still harming myself so they didn't know about the scars on my wrist which  
were irritated by the cuffs

we soon pull up at the court and I was excorted to the room we were in. I was excorted inside and stood infront off the judge. Evreyone had to rise untill the judge was in "can you confirm your name for us all and your age" the judge asks me so that's  
what I do "Maddison Doyle, 18 years old" I say casually "on your file it says that your 17" he responds looking really confused.

I really wanted to laugh but I stopped myself "well you don't stay one age for the rest of your life, I turned 18 two weeks back" I respond as casually as I could and he nods "we are here today to decide the sentence of Miss Doyle" the judge begins "on  
the 21st of April 2015 miss Doyle has admitted to brutality murdering Mr John Sigwell before a month later she murdered her own mother Shell Doyle" the judge tells the court room

I was told to sit while people gave evidence. I didn't know why because I've already been found guilty.

It felt like forever for the evidence to be given but we finally on break. The jury we're going to discuss the sentence and I was bricking it.

I was watched and not aloud out off anyone's sight. Soon the judge and jury came back into the court room and I was told to stand "we have came to a decision" they start and pause for a while, I just wanted to shout 'just tell me already' but I knew I  
would get in trouble for doing so.

"Maddison Doyle your are sentenced to life in Wentworth correctional center, without parole" the judge tells me and I didn't know what to say at all.

I was soon excorted out off the court and back into the van which drove straight back to Wentworth. I was taken inside and was to do a strip search, gosh I hate these.

I was take Evreything off like told and I hated it. Miss Bennett asked me what the scars I had were but I wasn't going to tell her.

After the search I was excorted to the exercise yard. I walk over to Franky and the girls plastering a fake smile onto my face trying not to think off what happened today "Maddy, how'd it go?" Franky asks me and my fake smile fades

"Life" I say with no emotion what so ever in my voice "life what about parol?" Bea asks me "without parole" I then say once again without any emotion in my voice.

"Maddy I can tell your faking being alright with this" Franky tells me handing my daughter to me. I tried to make out I was fine but Franky can always tell.

After exercise period we had work period and I went to the laundry room and moved the bags and tipped them out while holding my daughter in my left arm.

After work period I went back to the unit and placed Mackenzie down for her nap and sat down on my bed wanting to be alone.


End file.
